Thursday, June 16, 2011

My Top Ten Celebrity Crushes...

Since I'm celebrating my blogs 2nd birthday, I've decided that I don't want to be serious this week. I want to have a little fun. So, here's the first of my two top tens this week. My top ten crushes. We've all had crushes on celebrities, and if you say that you didn't you sir or miss are a liar. We've all had them, and often, we have come to regret them with that inevitable, what the hell was I thinking. Some are drop dead gorgeous; others are just plain weird. They are actors, athletes, and singers. Some of these guys I still kinda hold a torch for; others have been voted off the island. Without further ado here are my top ten crushes, how they won my little black heart....Feel free to openly mock me...

#10-Philip Michael Thomas. It was the 80's. Miami Vice was all the rage, and somewhere along the way I lost my ever loving mind over Philip Michael Thomas aka "Ricardo Tubbs." I thought he was absolutely gorgeous and would beg my mom to let me watch Miami Vice every Friday Night. I didn't even cringe when he released that horrible album and subsequently bad video. Now, looking back at those old Miami Vice episodes, I think to myself, "Self, how could you have let that happen? What were you thinking? Bad hair, gross chest hair, bad clothes, bad acting? Why?" My only answer: It was the 80's. We also thought big hair, bike tights w/church shoes, and Cosby sweaters were a good idea.

#9-Brian Stokes Mitchell. It started with Trapper John, M.D. Brian Mitchell played Dr. Justin "Jackpot" Jackson. He was absolutely gorgeous. Unlike Philip, Brian was "ow!" gorgeous. I was so glad when he made it back to tv as Trevor Collins on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air. He's been popping up in quite a few movies as well, even though his bread and butter is Broadway. If I could see one person on Broadway it would be Brian Stokes Mitchell. Even at age 53, I still adore him. He is talented and beautiful, and you will not change my mind about that.

#8-Lex Luger. No words. He was the "Total Package." His arrogance, his swagger, the flowing blonde mane, and he was a member of the Four Horseman. How could you not like him? He was pals with Sting. He had a finishing move called the "Human Torture Rack." *Smile* He had me at torture rack. I would stay up late watching WCW on Friday Nights. I would watch Clash of the Champions, Pay-Per-Views, WCW Mags (I even have a WWF Magazine with Lex Luger and Michael Jordan on the cover, be jealous). My mom even jokingly gave me a Lex Luger action figure for Christmas one year. My bedroom walls were covered with Lex Luger posters. Yeah, I was a weird kid. I hope he is recovering from his injuries.

#7-George Michael. It was the 80's. George was the front man for Wham! We knew there was something different about George. We did. We didn't want to admit it. We just wanted to swoon as he sang "Careless Whisper" and jam when he belted "Wake me up before you go-go." Then, came the Faith album. Hearts, including mine, were swooning as he seduced with "One More Try," wanted the be the stalkee in "Father Figure," became perplexed with the "Monkey" video. That's when we figured out what was wrong with George. Or at least I did. So, he's gay. He can still sing "One More Try" to me, when he's not wrapping his Range Rover around a pole after a bit of the Mary Jane.

#6-Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson was my favorite singer of the 80's. Off the Wall, Thriller, Bad, in the 80's Michael Jackson could to no wrong. Plus, he was cute. I mean, Key-eute. Yes, he was. I wanted to be Nola Ray, even though I was only in the 3rd grade when the "Thriller" video premiered. I was too young to really remember the pre-first-nose job Michael Jackson. I wish somebody had told him to stop with the Thriller nose. I found absolutely nothing wrong with the bow tie, pink shirt, and high water leather pants in the "Billie Jean" video. I had the t-shirts, the posters, and the albums. If it had his picture on it, I was getting it. When I was moving, I found a Michael Jackson belt among my childhood possessions. Then came the Bad album and the Bad face. I still like the music, but my crush ended with the "Bad" video when he revealed the new face.

#5-Javier Lopez. Just his name was sexy. Ha-vee-air Lo-pez... *Pause for nostalgia* He was gorgeous. Puerto Rican cutie with that fabulous accent. He was slow as molasses around the bases, but that just gave us a little longer to watch that tush go around the bases. Yeah, I said it. Javy was so dreamy. My cousin sent my this 8"x 10" of him that travel with me throughout college. So cute. Plus, he was a homerun hitter. Then, he wasn't a Brave. Crush over. Okay, I'm lying...he's still cute. Love you, Javy!!

#4-Orlando Bloom. Orlando had me at the first awkward stare of Legolas in The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. The blonde haired elf with the bow and arrow who wiped out Orcs with ease with his endless supply of arrows and white handled knives. Adored him as he competed with Gimli the dwarf in The Two Towers. I loved him more when he went to his natural dark hair and dark eyes. He looked so cute, so earnest. Yet, the acting...*shrug* At least, he's pretty. I have posters of Orlando in my classroom. A Pirates poster given to me by a student, LOTR posters (I teach LOTR), Kingdom of Heaven (I also teach the Crusades), and Troy (I teach the Iliad, too). I'm surrounded by his beauty daily. As a practical joke, one of my classes bought me a poster of a shirtless Orlando from Kingdom of Heaven, it is currently in my garage. Doesn't match the home decor. Maybe my office...

#3-Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. Have you seen Dwayne? I've seen him. He almost had me rooting for the University of Miami. Almost. He was so cute when he first started wrestling. Bad little curls and all. He was really the only reason I watched the WWF. I was a WCW girl. I crushed even more when he became a bad guy. I like heels. Sue me. The eyebrow, the tattoos, the "putting his foot up your candy-a**." Yes, I could most definitely smell what the Rock was cooking. Now, he's a part time wrestler and full time actor. Only the Rock could make me watch Race to Witch Mountain, The Game Plan, and the Tooth Fairy. Two of which I might not ever watch again, sorry Dwayne. Faster...just...yeah *toothy grin*...Fast Five? I'm gonna have to try again. He's 39 and is just getting better with age. By the way, have you seen this guy smile? Yes!!!

#2-Tony Gonzalez. We've been through this before. What is there not to love about Tony Gonzalez? He's Tony "freaking" Gonzalez. 6'5" of caramel deliciousness. I've followed his career since I first saw him on the basketball court hooping for Cal. *Pause...Tony Gonzalez in shorts* Then, he was drafted for my favorite team, the Kansas City Chiefs. All TG all the time. Watching extend to snatch down passes, scoring impossible touchdowns, and of course, slam dunking over the field goal post. Then, he had that great smile. Always sincere and cute. He holds practically every tight end record in the league. This might be his last season. Hopefully, he will work on the acting or go to the broadcast booth. (Please avoid Syfy, we don't need another A. I. Assault [click the link you won't regret it] movie) Maybe he could team up with the Rock, they can pass for brothers.

#1-David Justice. I started watching the Braves waiting to see Lex Luger, then I saw David Justice, and it was like "Lex Who?" David Justice-1990 Rookie of the Year. I was in the 10th grade, and well...He was on the cover of my textbooks, in the locker, on the walls of my bedroom, (move over Lex and Michael), and my back. I must have had a David Justice T-shirt for everyday of the week. Hell, I spent most of my college career decked out in Braves gear. For my graduation gift, I received a trip to Atlanta and tickets to watch David Justice play at Atlanta Fulton County Stadium (still the only professional game I've ever been able to attend). Heck, I even have a poster of him up in my office. He even helped me with math. I learned how to calculate batting averages watching him. (Yes, I tracked his batting average for an entire year, just because *shrug*) No one screamed louder when he hit the homerun to help Tom Glavine win the 1995 World Series. I wore a black band around my Braves jersey when he was traded in 1997. I was heartbroken when I first saw him in a Cleveland Indians uni, then chest blow when when he was traded to the Yankees and won another ring. No one was happier than me to see him on Twitter. Still cute after all these years.
Well, there they are. I just realize that a few of these guys kinda look alike...huh... Yes, I am aware that Shawne Merriman is not on the list. This is over the years. More than a few years. These were like really long term crushes. He's #11. He'll eventually knock Philip Michael Thomas off the list. He's a young 'un any way. So, who are your some of your crushes?

So until next time... "The only true love is love at first sight; second sight dispels it."~Israel Zangwill

1 comment:

  1. I can't even laugh! I loved Phillip Michael Thomas too! Other crushes Sting (wrestler), Michael Jackson, Bo Jackson, El Dabarge....I believed I've incriminated myself enough! LOL Can't wait for the other posts!