NFL Week 6: What Quarterback Controversy?

It's week 6, and as if the action on the field is not enough, we have to deal with the off the field issues around the NFL.  Like Cam Newton, is he damaging his team by riding his segway down a busy street with no helmet?  Will Tony Romo be able to take back his job from Dak Prescott? What is wrong with Brock Osweiller? SC Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg calls Colin Kaepernick's protests stupid, before apologizing for not really understanding what it was about. Oh, by the way, Kaep will be starting today with 49ers after restructuring his contract.

Back to the field, how about those Chargers and that win against the Broncos that no one, not even Philip Rivers saw coming?  How about those shockingly horrible uniforms the Broncos were wearing? That uniform however matched their sloppy play against a San Diego Chargers team that had been finding multiple ways to lose close games.

So who in the office pool had Minnesota as the last remaining undefeated team?  They lose Teddy Bridgewater before the season even began, and they lose Adrian Peterson in the second week of the season (so did I, because he was on my fantasy team). The only thing they haven't lost is a game, even with Sam Bradford at the helm. Is he who we thought  he was going to be?  It's still early...

My Chiefs are headed to Raider land this week to take on Jack Del Rio and the rest of that (be polite). The Chiefs can't afford to take this team lightly. The Raiders are 4-1 sitting atop of the AFC West after that mess of a performance turned in by the Broncos who dropped to second with his 4-2 record, while the Chiefs are sitting only 2 games above the basement dwelling Chargers.  The Chiefs went into their bye with an embarrassing nationally televised game against the Steelers.  I'm hoping the first Raider week of the year goes my Chiefs way.

I know, I know, Tom Brady won his first game back. I get it, but we all expected it, and it was Cleveland, so...Fantasy Fans, do not forget that Minnesota and Tampa Bay have byes this week.

For the fans who think that I don't still follow the Tony Gonzalez goings on:  Tony Gonzalez will be appearing on this week's episode of NCIS. Hopefully, he will have more than the one scene he has had in the previous two episodes. Also, Tony G. will be appearing on Spike TV's Lip Sync Battle later this season competing against Ray Lewis, yeah, that Ray Lewis.  He will also be in the new XXX movie with Vin Diesel which will premiere in January. So much for an easy retirement.

Last week was a great one for me. One: because the Chiefs were not on tv to embarrass me, two: my fantasy team Lucille Swings cleaned up without a kicker (4-1, y'all), and three: I went 11-3 last week with my picks bringing my season total to 45-32.

Sunday, October 16, 2016
San Francisco 49ers vs. Buffalo Bills:  Buffalo
Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Chicago Bears:  Chicago
Los Angeles Rams vs. Detroit Lions: Detroit
Cincinnati Bengals vs. New England Patriots: New England
Cleveland Browns vs. Tennessee Titans: Tennessee
Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Miami Dolphins: Pittsburgh
Carolina Panthers vs. New Orleans Saints:  Carolina
Baltimore Ravens vs. New York Giants: New York
Philadelphia Eagles vs. Washington Redskins: Philadelphia
Kansas City Chiefs vs. Oakland Raiders: Kansas City
Dallas Cowboys vs. Green Bay Packers: Green Bay
Atlanta Falcons vs. Seattle Seahawks: Seattle
Indianapolis Colts vs. Houston Texans: Indianapolis

Monday, October 17, 2016
New York Jets vs. Arizona Cardinals: Arizona

Thursday, October 20, 2016
Chicago Bears vs. Green Bay Packers:  Packers

That's all I've got for today. This will be a busy tv week for me: Tony G. on NCIS,  American Horror Story, The Rocky Horror Picture Show (live?), and the return of The Walking Dead (finally!). Until next week, "Unpredictability means what it means. I don't know how you define it. It is what it is."-Michael Keaton

NFL Week Three

Guys, it is already Week Three in the NFL. The only thing we really know is that Bill Belichick has apparently sold his sold to the devil, because even without Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski, the New England Patriots are winning. Just winning...Just making me absolutely nauseated. Talking parity in the NFL, there are only 7 undefeated teams left. Denver, Baltimore, Pittsburgh, New England, New York Giants, Philadelphia (really, Philly?), and Minnesota.

Green Bay, Seattle, and Kansas City look mediocre at best, which of course worries me. The Chiefs lost to a Houston team that had their behinds handed to them by the Patriots four days later. They also broke their eleven game regular season win streak which began when a former Tight End (pictured above) hit that drum. They just can't seem to keep the opposing defense away from Alex Smith. UGH...Green Bay and Seattle lost to teams they would have easily handle in the past. Philly is killing it with a rookie quarterback. FYI, Jay Cutler...just call it a career. I don't think your heart has been in it for years. 

My fantasy team took a hit this week with Adrian Peterson after he tore his meniscus last week. In Thursday nights game, Jacoby Brissett joined Jimmy Garoppolo on the bench with Tom Brady. Belichick will probably win with the janitor at QB next week, though...Don't forget, Bye Weeks begin next week.

I would like to take a moment to say a prayer for Jose Fernandez. The 24 year old star pitcher for the Miami Marlins was killed last night in a boating accident. Today's game against the Atlanta Braves has been cancelled. Rest in Peace...

Last week, my Chiefs, the Pack, and the Hawks hurt my heart. I still ended the week 11-5 bringing my season to 21-11. Let's try again...

Sunday, September 25, 2016
San Francisco 49ers vs. Seattle Seahawks: Seattle (not two weeks in a row)
San Diego Chargers vs. Indianapolis Colts: Indianapolis (like the Hawks, I can't see two weeks in a row)
New York Jets vs, Kansas City Chiefs: Kansas City (Here's hoping my Chiefs can play like the team I know exists there.)
Arizona Cardinals vs. Buffalo Bills: Arizona
Denver Broncos vs. Cincinnati Bengals: Cincinnati (I just need the Broncos to lose.)
Detroit Lions vs. Green Bay Packers: Green Bay
Oakland Raiders vs. Tennessee Titans: Tennessee
Cleveland Browns vs. Miami Dolphins: Miami (in what has to be the saddest game of the day)
Washington Redskins vs. New York Giants: New York (I have little faith in Washington.)
Minnesota Vikings vs. Carolina Panthers: Carolina
Baltimore Ravens vs. Jacksonville Jaguars: Baltimore
Los Angeles Rams vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Tampa Bay
Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Philadelphia Eagles: Pittsburgh
Chicago Bears vs. Dallas Cowboys: Dallas

Monday, September 26, 2016
Atlanta Falcons vs. New Orleans Saints: New Orleans (Atlanta just struggles at the Dome)

Thursday, September 29, 2016
Miami Dolphins vs. Cincinnati Bengals: Cincinnati

Okay everybody, enjoy your last byeless week for a while, and until next week, "Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." -Gilda Radner

NFL Week 2 Picks

It has been a heck of a week in the NFL. The week began with the folly that was the Ray Rice suspension.  Most fans thought the 2 game suspension for knocking out his then girlfriend was a joke, but apparently, the NFL needed to see the graphic footage that they claim they could not get (yet, TMZ could) before they realized that it was a round house that knocked out Janay Rice.  Baltimore dropped Rice, and the league suspended him indefinitely. This is one of the things about the NFL and other leagues that I do not care for.  Ray Rice was not the first, and he probably won't be the last. There have been two more incidents since that February night.  My team the Chiefs have had to deal with these issues, too.  There was Larry Johnson who seemed to have an inability to control his temper around women, and the worst possible case of Jovan Belcher and the murder of his girlfriend Kasandra Perkins almost two years ago. The revamp of the policy is a step forward, but there needs to be so much more done to prevent these incidents from happening.


There is one more they don't even talk about-Darren Sharper.  I'll admit that I was a fan of Sharper during his time in the league, but the league fired Sharper and has barely made mention of the fact that he may have been a serial rapist while employed by the league's network.


Then, there is Adrian Peterson. For the past few years, Peterson has been one of the faces of the NFL, but after this weekend, who knows.  Peterson was charged and booked on child abuse charges in Texas.  Peterson claims he just gave his son a "whooping" to discipline him. Now, I'm the product of corporal punishment, but there comes a point where you cross the line. Peterson crossed the line. I've seen the pictures, and as a teacher, I would have had to report him too.  He is deactivated this week. Just another crack in the NFL armor.


There are days that I regret being a fan...

Last week, I had a bad one, 7-8. Sigh, this is half-hearted right now.
Sunday, September 14
Miami Dolphins at Buffalo Bills:  Miami
Atlanta Falcons at Cincinnati Bengals:  Cincinnati
New England Patriots at Minnesota Vikings:  New England
Jacksonville Jaguars at Washington Redskins:  Washington
New Orleans Saints at Cleveland Browns:  New Orleans
Arizona Cardinals at New York Giants:  New York
Dallas Cowboys at Tennessee Titans:  Dallas
Detroit Lions at Carolina Panthers:  Detroit
Seattle Seahawks at San Diego Chargers:  Seattle
St. Louis Rams at Tampa Bay Buccaneers:  Tampa Bay
Kansas City Chiefs at Denver Broncos:  Denver
New York Jets at Green Bay Packers: Green Bay
Houston Texans at Oakland Raiders:  Houston
Chicago Bears at San Francisco 49ers:  San Francisco
Monday, September 15
Philadelphia Eagles at Indianapolis Colts:  Indianapolis
Thursday, September 18
Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Atlanta Falcons:  Atlanta

NFL Week 17 Picks...

Welcome back, everybody!!! Well, it's finally here.  The last week of the season.  Many of us will be saying goodbye until August to some of our teams.  *clears throat* The Chiefs.  While the fans of 12 teams will be looking forward to the playoffs. 

This has been a rather unique season.  Playoff stalwarts like Ben Roethlisberger, Drew Brees, and Philip Rivers will be watching from home a changing of the guard as a possible 4 rookies have opportunities to shine in the playoffs- Robert Griffin, III, Colin Kaepernick, Andrew Luck, and Russell Wilson.  Not to mention they will each battle to see who will be the Rookie of the Year.

Comeback players of the year Peyton Manning and Adrian Peterson have simply gone about business as usual.  Peyton has established his reign as the new boss of the AFC West, which wasn't difficult considering the Raiders, Chargers, and Chiefs don't really pose a threat to anyone.   Peyton is well on his way to another MVP as he and the Broncos fight for homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.

Adrian Peterson is returning from major knee surgery with an opportunity to not only break Eric Dickerson 28 year old rushing record of 2,105 yards but a slight possibility of making the playoffs.  He is 208 yards from completing that task.  Good luck to the voters choosing Comeback player of the year.

Calvin Johnson broke Jerry Rice's record of single-season receiving yards last week by amassing 1,892 yards.  He has a really good chance today of becoming the first receiver to hit the 2,000 yard mark and to take down Michael Irvin's record of 12 games with 100 receiving.  Good Luck, Megatron.

For this fan, I finally had the chance to see my Chiefs play live, and they had an amazing come from behind victory against the New Orleans Saints.  They proceeded to win 1 more total game, and considering they are playing Peyton Manning today, I don't really see them winning one more.  It has been an all-around bad year for the Chiefs.  Two wins on the season, fans wanting to revolt, and I won't even discuss the events of December 1.  Clark Hunt is going to have to take a long hard look at his team going into next season.  The Chiefs are in need of many things including a head coach, general manager, and quarterback, and I don't see the draft helping with the quarterback issue.  Ah, well...Thanks guys for a great first game from this fan.  I'll see you in August!  The Chiefs will be better next year!

I also had the chance to see my favorite player Tony Gonzalez play live this year as well, during what was arguably his best game of the season with 15 receptions, 122 yards, and 2 touchdowns (#100 and #101).  TG has been selected to his 13th Pro Bowl, but he is looking forward to the playoffs with his Atlanta Falcons.  He has 88 receptions, 889 yards, and 8 touchdowns (He loves those 8s doesn't he?).  They have locked up homefield throughout the playoffs, and TG is looking forward to dancing into the sunset down Bourbon Street.  Who can blame him?  Sixteen seasons in the NFL.  He holds the tight-end records in receptions-1,237 (#2 all-time), touchdowns-103 (#6 all-time), receiving yards-14,227 (#7 all-time), 100 yard games-30, 1,000 yard seasons-4, and Pro Bowls-13.  A Super Bowl win is what he is looking for to cap off his storied career.  Good luck, TG!!!

Now for the picks.  Last week, I went 13-3 (Tampa Bay, Houston, and San Francisco, y'all couldn't help a sister out?).  My record for the season is 122-77.  Let's pad that total...

Sunday, December 30
Houston Texans vs. Indianapolis Colts:  Indianapolis
Baltimore Ravens vs. Cincinnati Bengals:  Cincinnati
New York Jets vs. Buffalo Bills:  Buffalo
Cleveland Browns vs. Pittsburgh Steelers:  Pittsburgh
Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Tennessee Titans:  Tennessee
Chicago Bears vs. Detroit Lions:  Chicago
Philadelphia Eagles vs. New York Giants:  New York (C'mon, Eli!!!)
Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. Atlanta Falcons:  Atlanta
Carolina Panthers vs. New Orleans Saints:  New Orleans (Congrats, Sean Payton on your contract extension!)
Miami Dolphins vs. New England Patriots: New England
Kansas City Chiefs vs. Denver Broncos:  Denver (Although it would be wonderful if the Chiefs could pull this one out.)
Oakland Raiders vs. San Diego Chargers:  San Diego
Green Bay Packers vs. Minnesota Vikings:  Green Bay
St. Louis Rams vs. Seattle Seahawks:  Seattle
Arizona Cardinals vs. San Francisco 49ers:  San Francisco
Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins:  Washington
 
So that's all, y'all.  Until next week, "Success without honor is an unseasoned dish; it will satisfy your hunger, but it won't taste good."~Joe Paterno

Eric Dickerson, 2,105 yards in 1984

Read more at: http://nesn.com/2012/12/nfl-record-chase-live-adrian-peterson-chases-eric-dickerson-j-j-watt-and-aldon-smith-in-reach-of-sacks-record/

Picks from a Maniac Maenad-Week 3

It's week three everybody, and parity is running rampant in the NFL. Once again, up is down and down is up. Who would have thought that going into week 3 the Chiefs, Dolphins, Texans, and Buccaneers would be sitting atop their divisions with 2-0 records? Who could have foreseen that Dallas, Minnesota, and San Francisco floundering in the basement with the same 0-2 record as the Lions, Bills, and Browns? It's craziness!!! Sheer Craziness!!!

The Jets upset the New England Patriots on Sunday (yeah, I said it. How many people besides Jets fans thought they were going to win last Sunday?), and then Braylon Edwards proceeded to get a DWI. Sigh...I'll talk about that later, but seriously, the Jets need to reign in their players. With Miami currently at the top and New England always in the hunt, there is too much foolishness going on in that locker room. From top to bottom, get it together Jets, you have too much talent to become the Raiders.

Michael Vick showed that he still has a lot of Michael Vick left in him. Then, lost the starting job to Kevin Kolb, then gained the job back within the span of two days. I can see that Andy Reid has been reading the Brett Favre book How to Waffle and Try not to Appear like a Moron. Speaking of "Paw-Paw" Favre, what is going on in Minnesota? Favre looked like a grandfather last week on the sidelines of that game (he seriously looked like he was wishing for a Barcalounger and a remote control).

Tennessee pulled Vince Young, again for Kerry Collins after the Pittsburgh and Troy Polomalu ran rough shot over the Titans. Young will be behind center today, but he looked bad last Sunday. I'm not talking about my Chiefs. Washington fell apart as the Texans took over the AFC South. Tampa Bay and Josh Freeman are showing much improvement and are tied with the Saints in the South. San Diego took apart the Jacksonville Jaguars on a week I had them on the bench. Saints are still playing like the champs.

I am having a hard time in fantasy. My record thus far is a pathetic 2-10...My five teams have been stinking to high heaven...I have great players who are not doing great things. Hecate's Hellhounds rolled last week on the legs of Adrian Peterson and the arm of Philip Rivers. The Runtelldat Homeboys barely cleared the hurdle with Miles Austin leading the team. The Cromartie Eight, Kansas City Chiefs (unlike the real Chiefs), and Matching Mugshots are still swimming in a flooded basement.

I was 8-8 last week, mostly because I was a buster rolling behind Dallas, Minnesota and New England. My record pick record is still slightly above .500 at 18-13. Let's see how I will fair this week.

Cincinnati v. Carolina-Cincinnati
Buffalo v. New England-New England
San Francisco v. Kansas City-My ex-husband vs. my current. My upset of the day *closing my eyes* Kansas City Chiefs
Tennessee v. New York Giants-New York Giants
Cleveland v. Baltimore-Baltimore
Pittsburgh v. Tampa Bay-Pittsburgh
Atlanta v. New Orleans-I have 4 fantasy players in this game: Tony Gonzalez, Drew Brees, Pierre Thomas and Jason Snelling. New Orleans
Detroit v. Minnesota-Minnesota, although Detroit looked really good last week.
Dallas v. Houston-Houston. I can't even look at Dallas.
Philadelphia v. Jacksonville-Even with the foolishness in Philly, I'm taking the Eagles
Washington v. St. Louis. Washington
Indianapolis v. Denver-Indianapolis
Oakland v. Arizona-Arizona
San Diego v. Seattle-San Diego
New York Jets v. Miami-New York Jets

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL: Green Bay v. Chicago. Chicago is much improved with that new Mike Martz's offense. I still don't trust Cutler. I'm going with Aaron Rodgers and the Packers.

Well, that's all I've got folks. Until next week "It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get up." Vince Lombardi

Fantasy Draft #2: Introducing Hecate's HellHounds...

It's the weekend, everybody! Today was the second of my fantasy drafts. This draft takes place with the NF L. com fantasy football , and the league is called the League of Champions. Once again, bec ause the draft order is randomized, we didn't find out our draft order until this morning. I had the 2nd pick out of 12! Let me introduce you to Hecate's HellHounds!

Introducing my starting line-up:
1st round-2th pick RB Adrian Peterson Minnesota Vikings. Despite a battle with the fumble-itis last year (7 fumbles), Peterson finished the season with 1383 yards and 18 touchdowns. 2009 Fantasy stats: 268.70 fantasy points.

2nd round-23rd pick QB Philip Rivers San Diego Chargers. Philip is one of my favorite quarterbacks, mostly because of that Southern Charm and his ability to get under the skin of opposing players. Rivers finished the season 4254 yards and 28 touchdowns to 9 interceptions. He'll be without his favorite WR Vincent Jackson, but he still has Antonio Gates. 2009 Fantasy stats: 307.70 fantasy points.

3rd round-26th pick RB Ryan Grant Green Bay Packers. Grant may not have the yards that Peterson does, but he has great hands. He committed only one fumble last year. He finished the season with 1253 rushing yards and 11 touchdowns. 2009 Fantasy stats: 201.15 fantasy points.

4th round-47th pick WR Wes Welker New England Patriots. This is the down side of having a high pick. Something has to to suffer; for me, it is my receiving corps. Welker is Tom Brady's go to guy when Randy Moss is under pressure. He finished the season with 1348 yards and 4 touchdowns. 2009 Fantasy stats: 95.00 fantasy points.

5th round-50th pick The Captain of the HellHounds-TE Tony Gonzalez Atlanta Falcons. I got Tony, I got Tony...ha-ha-ha-haa-ha...ha-ha-ha-haa-ha...Uh-uhm. In his first year as an (sigh) Atlanta Falcon, TG finished the season with 867 yards and 6 touchdown. His next catch will be number 1,000, the first Tight End to reach that number. 2009 Fantasy stats: 79.35 fantasy points.

6th round-71st pick WR Pierre Garcon Indianapolis Colts. Last season, Garcon finshed with 765 yards and 4 touchdowns in 13 games. Plus, Peyton Manning is throwing to him. 2009 Fantasy stats: 63.25 points.

7th round-74th pick DEF Minnesota Vikings. Vikings finished 6th in overall defense last year. They led the league with 48 sacks, and they tacked on 11 interceptions. 2009 Fantasy Stats: 116 fantasy points.

8th round-95th pick WR Malcolm Floyd San Diego Chargers. Malcolm Floyd should benefit from Vincent Jackson's absence because of Jackson's holdout and impending suspension. He finished the 2009 season with 776 yards and 1 touchdown. Just one? C'mon, man. 2009 Fantasy stats: 44.80 points.

These are my bench players:
9th round-97th pick DEF San Diego Chargers (Lights out is back! Plus, I didn't want another team with the Chargers.

10th round-119th pick RB Clinton Portis Washington Redskins
11th round-122nd pick QB Carson Palmer Cincinnati Bengals
12th round-143rd pick TE Heath Miller Pittsburgh Steelers
13th round-146th pick WR Dexter McCluster Kansas City Chiefs
14th round-167th pick K Ryan Longwell Minnesota Vikings
15th round-169th pick WR Nate Burleson Detroit Lions

Will the HellHounds wreak havoc upon the League of Champions, or will they be a team of pitiful puppies? Only time will tell. What do you think? Leave me a line.

So until next time remember, "Football is easy, if you're crazy as hell."~Bo Jackson

Fantasy Running Backs Report

Howdy do, everybody. Well, it's almost that time again. Training camps start to open in two weeks, and I begin searching for the right players to fill my fantasy rosters. I like most fantasy owners usually pick our starting running back first, because outside the quarterback, this will be the player that brings your team the most fantasy points. I don't rank players. I leave that to you. I am merely going to show you what I'm looking for in a fantasy running back. Yards and touchdowns. I don't care about carries because they don't get you points. Carries are important in the world outside of fantasy football, because that wear and tear will bring a quick downfall to a running backs career. So, if I'm picking in the top 5, these are the 5 running backs I'm aiming to anchor my fantasy team.

Chris Johnson of the Tennessee Titans. Chris Johnson is one fast brother. I love watching him outrun opposing teams. He lead all rushers last year with 2oo6 yards, with an additional 503 receiving yards for a total of 2509 all purpose yards. Remember, in fantasy, all yards count unless they are special teams. Johnson logged in 8 games last year with 130 or more yards, including a monster game against Jacksonville where he racked up 228 rushing and 11 receiving yards. Johnson was also the top fantasy point provider from last year with 321.75 fantasy points. He scored 14 touchdowns and only fumbled the football 3 times in 16 games. He's not perfect. He struggled against Pittsburgh Defense which held him to only 57 rushing yards and Indy who held him to a mere 34 yards in the first game and 113 in the second. As a part of the AFC South, he will face Indy twice this year, as well as, Pittsburgh, and Dallas. That said, I will have a snowballs chance on the equator of getting Johnson, but if by some fluke I get the first pick, I'm going with Johnson all the way.

Adrian Peterson of the Minnesota Vikings. Adrian had a bit of drop off last year in fantasy, mostly because of his attack of fumblitis. That said, Adrian still finished the season 4th in rushing with 1383 yards rushing and 436 yards receiving. Adrian only had 3 game last year where he rushed for over 100 yards. As I said earlier, Adrian has had a bout with the droppsies. He had 7 fumbles last year and lost 6 of them. This is not good in fantasy especially if fumbles are negative point in your league. In his defense, he has been spending the offseason working with a custom football filled with sand to improve his hands. I hope it works for his sake. That's the bad news. The good news is that Adrian lead all rushers with 18 touchdowns and finished the fantasy season with 268.70 points in second place behind Chris Johnson. Even with the fums, I would still make Adrian my first or second pick.

Maurice Jones-Drew of the Jacksonville Jaguars. Jones-Drew has been a darling in the fantasy world for the last couple of years, even drafting himself for his fantasy league. Yeah, I know what he did to Shawne Merriman a few years ago. I was watching the game. Shut up. Anyway, Jones-Drew has no trouble telling fantasy players to pick him. Jones-Drew finished 3rd in rushing last year with 1391 yards and with 374 yards receiving. Jones-Drew also scored 15 touchdowns last year. Jones-Drew only had 2 fumbles last year so he will hold onto the ball. Jones-Drew had five games of 100 or more yards rushing. Jones-Drew finished the Fantasy season with 253.80. Although I dislike him for obvious reasons, I'd have no problem with Jones-Drew as my fantasy rusher.

Frank Gore of the San Francisco 49ers. Frank Gore's numbers were down a bit from last year. He missed two games last season, but still managed 5 games of 100 or more rushing yards, including one game over 200. He finished the season with 1,120 yards rushing and 406 yards receiving. I truly believe if Gore is healthy those numbers will improve this year. Gore scored 10 touchdowns in 2009. He had a total of 210.30 fantasy points. Gore, if healthy, is a solid fantasy starters.

Thomas Jones of the Kansas City Chiefs. I was relunctant to list Thomas Jones. He put up some pretty good numbers last year as a New York Jet. He was third in rushing yards with 1402 and another 48 receiving. Jones also tied for third in rushing touchdowns with 14. He only had 2 fumbles and finished in the fantasy standings with 227.10 points. The problem you ask? He'll be behind the line of my favorite team the Chiefs. Sigh. I don't see him putting up those numbers behind our line. Who knows he may surprise us all...

Other Top 10 Running Backs:
Ray Rice (Baltimore Ravens), Steven Jackson (St. Louis Rams), Ryan Grant (Green Bay Packers), Pierre Thomas (New Orleans Saints), Michael Turner (Atlanta Falcons), and Jonathan Stewart (Carolina Panthers).

Rookie on the Rise: Ryan Mathews of the San Diego Chargers. He was the Chargers first round pick and is hoping to fill the very big shoes left behind by Ladanian Tomlinson. Last year at Fresno State, he rushed for 1808 yards averaging 150 yards per game with 19 touchdowns. Impressive. I don't expect those numbers in the NFL, but he just might be my sleeper for the year.

*Fantasy Tip: Make sure that you are aware of the bye week of your players before you draft them. You only have a limited number of reserves, and if all of your starters are off on the same week, you can call that a loss.

Until next time "Football is easy if you're crazy as hell." ~Bo Jackson

**stats courtesy of NFL.com and FantasyFootballChallenge.com

To the Ladies...

Today, I am going to talk about ladies and fantasy football. Let's be real for a moment shall we. There are those girls who watch football because of the hot guys. That's cool. There are those girls who watch football only because their husband or boyfriend watches. Whatever. Then, there are those women who watch football because they love the game, admire the athleticism, and genuinely enjoy watching someone bring the pain every Sunday. That would be me.

Don't get me wrong I recognize the handsome fellows who play the game. I'm not blind, but let's face it, just because a dude is cute does not mean he is going to deliver the knock out blow to the fools in my league. (Sorry, I am preparing my trash talk.)

So, ladies, while I don't usually offer advice, I'm going to give some anyway:

1. Ladies, don't join a league because your boyfriend is in it. It's all fun in games until you beat him, and yes, he will be mad if you beat him. He will pretend he isn't, but he is.
2. Don't plan other pointless activities if your boyfriend is in a league or during football season for that matter. Let it go. Nothing is worse than a needy woman who interrupts the damn game to talk about her feelings, or plans dinner with the parents on his draft day. Talk about your feelings on Tuesday afternoon (Tuesday morning is for checking final scores), Wednesday, Friday, and some Thursdays. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday is Football. Deal with it. Same goes to those sensitive men who don't like football. I won't bother you during Masterpiece Theatre, so don't bother me during Monday Night Football.
3. Ladies, if your are going to play fantasy football. Play for real. Don't put your team in pink uniforms, no one, and I mean, no one will take you seriously. I played another lady last year, and my single goal was to systematically dismantle her team because she chose pink team colors. You disgust me, lady. You don't have to put a skull or flame on the side of your team helmet, but you better not put a pink letter. By the way, spanked her every time we played.
4. Ladies, do not pick players for the following reasons: Oooo, what a cute uniform! Oooo, he's cute! They will not get you points, and other members of the league will be forced to laugh at you. You may get lucky once, but that will be about it.

Now, just for fun, I will give you ten good looking guys who will get you points in the world of fantasy. They are in no particular order and by position. By the way, do take the time to learn what each position does and how it contributes to the team.

Quarterbacks

Tom Brady-New England Patriots: Okay, he's not my speed, but I am told that he is a good looking guy. Whatever. He was injured during the first game of the season when he injured his knee. He also developed a staph infection in the same knee. That said, in 2007, Brady was a fantasy big shot. He threw for 4806 yards and 50 touchdowns with only 8 interceptions. Don't expect the 50 touchdowns, but all of his other numbers should be about the same unless the mind plays tricks on him. Plus, he is throwing to Randy Moss and Wes Welker.

Drew Brees-New Orleans Saints-Not only is Brees cute, he delivers on the field as well. In 2008, Brees threw for 5,069 yards and 34 touchdowns, but he also threw 17 interceptions (which will cost you points). Even so he finished the fantasy football season as the number one quarterback in most leagues and is projected to finish near the top this year.

Running Backs

LaDanian Tomlinson-San Diego Chargers: I am biased when it comes to LT. You can't help, but love that smile. He was hurt last year, but he swears he's better this year. Even so, LT had 1110 rushing yards last year with 11 rushing TDs. He also had 426 recieving yards with 1 touchdown. Not bad for an off year. LT is still a top 10 running back (#1 if by looks alone).

Adrian Peterson-Minnesota Vikings: Another cutie, but he is a fantasy demon (he alone beat one of my teams last year). He finished one or two in most leagues last year. He finished the year with 1760 rushing yards and ten rushing touchdowns. He also had 125 receiving yards. He is projected to finish #1 this year. He should get plenty of touches considering his quarterback situation in Minnesota

Wide Receivers

Larry Fitzgerald-Arizona Cardinals: Normally, not for the long hair, but the dreads work for Mr. Fitzgerald. He is a part of one of, if not the best, wide receiver tandems in the league with Anquan Boldin. Fitzgerald finished the season last year with 1431 yards and 12 touchdowns and an appearance in the Super Bowl. Not bad, not bad at all. He finished #1 in practically every league last year and is projected to be top five this year.

Vincent Jackson-San Diego Chargers: Very cute and quite productive. Don't get me wrong, he is by no means a top ten receiver. Face it, the top receiver for the Chargers is usually TE Antonio Gates. Jackson benefitted from Gates' injury last year. Jackson is a top twenty receiver and will probably not be swept up until probably the 4th round. But, if we are going just on looks, you can't go wrong with Vincent Jackson. He finished the season with 1098 yards and seven touchdowns. He even tacked on 69 rushing yards. But beware, he may have to serve a suspension at some point in the season because of an offseason DUI (That bothered me, and I am wavering on VJ, but this is about looks anyway).

Tight Ends

Tony Gonzalez-Atlanta Falcons: First and foremost, it sucks having to say that Tony Gonzalez is an Atlanta Falcon. Now, I will admit I thought Tony was cute when he played for Cal so it was awesome that he was drafted by my favorite team. Not only is Tony the best looking Tight End in the league, he is the best to ever play the position (please don't send letters about Kellen Winslow, Sr., John Mackey, and Mike Ditka. I know how great they were, and I still would take Tony.). He holds practically every record available to tight ends including, touchdowns and receptions. He was the #1 fantasy tight end last season finishing with 1058 yards and 10 touchdowns. He was thrown to by three different quarterbacks last year. This year, he will be the target of Matty Ice, Matt Ryan, and he is projected to finish any where from 1st to 5th this season.

Antonio Gates-San Diego Chargers: The second best tight end, ha-ha. He is the best in the AFC, now that Gonzalez is in the NFC (which sucks for K2, Shockey, Whitten and Cooley). Actually, Gonzalez and Gates were 1 and 2 for a while, but Antonio has been dealing with injuries the last couple of years. That said, Antonio Gates finished as the 3rd or 4th fantasy tight end in most leagues last year with 704 yards and 8 touchdowns. He is projected to finish anywhere from 1st to 5th this year.

Defense

Most leagues pick an entire defense from a team or two. Some leagues pick individual defensive players. Make sure you know which rules your league is following. That said, two hottest and productive defensive players...

Shawne Merriman-Outside Linebacker San Diego Chargers: I know that I am picking a lot of Chargers, but they are the AFC West champs. Merriman only played one game last season before having surgery to repair a torn PCL and LCL (Merry Christmas, Tennessee). Prior to the injury, Merriman led the league with 39.5 sacks over the first three years of his career. After a year on the sideline, I think Merriman is due to return to his All Pro and Pro Bowl form and vault the Chargers back among the elite defenses. He will be terrorizing quarterbacks well into the playoffs and look good doing it!

Jason Taylor-Defensive End Miami Dolphins: Last year was an off season for this former Dancing with the Stars hottie. He had a calf injury, and he only registered 29 total tackles and 3.5 sacks a dip from the 11 sacks of the year before. I also don't think that Taylor was ever really happy in Washington. He seems happier this year and is back in Miami with Joey Porter. If he stays healthy, expect Taylor to have a good year.

I don't look at kickers. I just pick the highest one left. They shift from year to year anyway. So, girls if you have to pick a hottie for your team here are some good looking guys who also tear up the field. Next week, I will spend time truly evaluating the fantasy positions based on actual skills rather than looks.