Saturday, June 11, 2011

Hello, My Name is Cheryl...and I'm a Hater...

It is nothing new for people to call me a hater. Heck, my family called me that long before it became a popular word in the "Urban Dictionary." Even my Twitter handle, CIH8U2, expresses my card-carrying hater status. I embrace the hater in me. I really a hater?

Merriam-Webster (my go-to dictionary) defines a "hater" as "[1] one who expresses or feels extreme enmity or active hostility; [2] one who has a strong aversion to or finds something very distasteful." Urban Dictionary defines it as "A person that simply cannot be happy for another person's success. So rather than be happy they make a point of exposing a flaw in that person."
Let's examine that shall we.

I don't really hate people. Mostly, I need to get to know you before I will even dislike you. Okay, I'm lying. There are some people that just rub you the wrong way. I don't really care for them, I really don't want to meet them, and generally, spend most of my time trying not to think about them. Yet, their Stans won't let me be. I follow some pretty cool people, and I have some pretty cool followers on my Twitter Timeline. Then, there are the Stans. Not familiar with the term, well it's an allusion to Eminem's 2000 hit song "Stan." According to Urban Dictionary (hadn't quite made it to Merriam-Webster yet), a "stan" is "someone who is all up on their favorite artist's schlong, and can't take criticism or the slightest negative about said artist. But instead of "fans," they're called "Stans," get it?" [P.S. commas go inside the quotations marks Urban Dictionary].

So, I made a list of the things, according to the stans, that I hate. In no particular order they are Lebron James, Kobe Bryant, the Lakers, the Kardashians, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, the Twilight saga, Beyonce, Rihanna, Reggie Bush, and reality television.

LeBron James. Honestly, I could not care less about LeBron James. He could have taken his talents to Mars as far as I'm concerned. Why? I don't like the NBA in general. The last active series I watched was the 1994 NBA finals between the Knicks and the Rockets. The only reason I remembered is the O. J. Simpson White Bronco "chase." I'll maybe watch a total of 20 minutes of a game while my uncles bogard the television at Christmas, unless there is football, then the general consensus is NFL first. Do I like LeBron James? I don't know, never met the kid. Do I care to me him? No. Do I care that he could be as great as Michael Jordan? No. (I'm not a Jordan fan either). Ultimately, does he care that I don't really care for him? No. So, why do you care? He's going to make his money, he's going to win a couple of rings (maybe), and eventually, marry the mother of his two kids (I guess). The fact is when I watch the NBA, I root for the Celtics. I've rooted for the Celtics since 1979 (except for that brief flirtation with the Cavs because I had this completely random crush on Brad Daugherty). I liked Shaq and Charles Barkley (neither one of which is the best of guys, although I'd rather hang out with them than LeBron). I know that LeBron is one of the best players in the league. I don't hate him. I'm just not interested in him.


Kobe Bryant. Yeah, I'm a Kobe hater. I've been a card carrying Kobe hater since 1996. Why? He's a Laker. I hate the Lakers. I hate the Kobe Bryant that steps before the cameras. I hate the Kobe Bryant that takes the floor. I hate the petulant little boy who is always complaining about something-the media, his teammates, his coach, his wife. Whining, Whining, Whining. Do I hate Kobe Bryant the man? Once again, I don't know him. Yet, his public persona is not one I would like to get to know. He just comes off as a jerk. I don't think I will ever like Kobe, the Laker. Kobe the man? Jury is still out.


The Lakers. I'm a quasi-Celtics fan as such I will not root for the Lakers. Ever. Deal with it. Same goes for the Raiders, Cowboys, Broncos, and often the Yankees (but only when they occasionally play my Braves).

The Kardashians. These people. I don't know them. I wish I could scrub all knowledge of them from my mind. Yet, they have become a part of mainstream culture for no apparent reason. The matriarch Kris Jenner was once married to Robert Kardashian, a member of O. J.'s dream team, now deceased. She is currently married to Bruce Jenner who was popular when I was in diapers. The three older daughters Kourtney, Kim, and Khloe have the ability to get up in the morning and reasonably dress themselves in a stylish manner, look good in a bikini (not you Khloe), disrespect their parents publicly, make sex tapes (Kim), date and/or marry athletes (Kim and Khloe), date and get pregnant by a egomaniacal douche (Kourtney), open stores with over priced trinkets, shop, whine, spa, get paid to just show up places, and do so with the personality of a paper towel. Gee, why don't I love these people? They are saving the world one false eyelash blink at a time. Fact is when I hear them talk, I feel like I'm losing brain cells. They annoy me. If this is how they want to make their money, great more power to them. I'm not going to praise these people. They have done nothing to deserve it. They didn't start from scratch. They were born with a silver spoon and have now turned it into a full service. Like them if you wish, leave me out of it.

Kourtney Kardashian 2 2009 Kim Kardashian 2011 Khloe Kardashian 2009

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, and the Twilight saga. I can read. I read the books. I didn't like the characters on the page. Movies are almost always worse than the book. The books were horrible. I have not seen any of the movies and do not intend to. Just because they win MTV awards does not make them good actors. The stans vote for those awards. See the personality of the Kardashians.

Beyonce. I use to like Beyonce. I really did. I have three of the Destiny's Child cds and Beyonce's first two. Then, I noticed the pattern. All of her albums were basically the same. She didn't really reach and branch out from Destiny's Child, and her "writing" stayed the same. I lost interest. Sure, she's a great dancer, but I don't really care, because I don't really watch videos or award shows anymore. Sure, she's a beautiful girl, but I'm not a dude, so I don't care. I have noticed that, like Mariah Carey before her, each successive album she's wearing less clothes. I wonder why...any way let's hope she doesn't have a meltdown like Mariah. I just don't feel her music any more. I heard "Survivor" last night for the first time in a long time, and I realized that I didn't even really like it. I also do not like to hear her speak, because then it is obvious she didn't complete high school. (Take some of that money and hire a speech therapist). Hype is an amazing thing.

Beyonce, 2007

Rihanna is Beyonce with even less talent. Period. Don't like it? Listen to her live on a loop and get back to me. I don't hate her. Just her voice.

Rihanna 2010

Reggie Bush. I don't hate Reggie Bush. He just annoys me. Why? Because he insists on being not that public.

Lastly, reality shows. Yep. I hate them. I hate them with a passion (except the Amazing Race and Wipeout, but those are game shows.). Why? Mostly, because of the negative light it shines on most women. They make women look petty, loud, obnoxious, lewd, disgusting, loose, vindictive, and generally gross. I use to watch Bridzillas, and I would wonder, why is anybody friends with this person? The commercials for the Real Housewives [exs and baby mommas] of any city, Basketball Wives [exs and baby mommas], Football Wives [exs and baby mommas] makes me wonder why anybody would marry these people any time, any where? Some of them are professional people. Even if I could afford it, I wouldn't hire these people to do much of anything for me. Won't watch them...not going to do it. If you like them, great. I am not you.

At the end of the day, we all have different tastes. Our differences are what makes us special. I don't like what you like, and that's okay. Jealous...not likely. I am often too busy to even think about these people. I never wanted to be an athlete as I don't like to sweat. I don't even want to be famous. I don't like the idea of people following me and hanging on my every word. Okay, maybe the hanging on my every word. Enjoy your life. Why do you care so much that the world doesn't like what you like? If those things make you happy, I happy for you. Just don't try to convert me to the church of your stan. It's not going to happen. If that makes me a hater, well, I'll be over in the corner polishing my card.

Until next time, "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment."
Ralph Waldo Emerson


  1. Not bad! I understand your feelings completely. I could probably care less about Bush, the Kardashians, or Twilight if their fans didn't throw it in my face every 20 seconds. For me, I do admit to a bit of jealousy for some of these things. It's not to say that I deserve the spotlight, because I don't. It's because I know there are people who are more talented that don't get an opportunity because they choose not to whore themselves out. I definitely agree with you on how reality shows treat women. They make you all look really bad and to top it off, kids want to grow up to be them. Good post.

  2. Just getting around to reading your post and I love it! It is so true, when you give your opinion on a celeb/athlete people are quick to call it hate! I rolled laughing at your Reggie Bush reason, it is SO true! Smh