NFL Week 5: You Think You Know

Those of you who are about my age remember that wonderful time in the NFL when Jim Mora was the coach of the New Orleans Saints and the Indianapolis Colts.  Mora was a decent coach with .541 winning percentage, but much like Herman Edwards, Mora is mostly remembered for the soundbites that he provided after a Saints or a Colts lost. This is one of my particular favorites.



Last week was one of my worse weeks ever when it comes to making predictions. The only teams that seem to have their game plans in order are Denver (The last unbeaten team in the AFC), Minnesota, and Philly. Denver won the Super Bowl (Peyton had very little to do with that), so it is expected of them, but Minnesota and Philadelphia? WHAT?!

New England is no longer undefeated after that nightmarish game against...Buffalo? What the what, New England. The Colts lost in England to...wait for it...the Jaguars. Yes, those Jaguars and not the fancy car. The Falcons embarrassed the Panthers while Oakland and the Saints slipped past San Diego and Baltimore. The biggest embarrassment came later that evening on national television when the Pittsburgh Steelers took my Kansas City Chiefs to the woodshed. I have never been so glad that Fear the Walking Dead was on at the same time. There was less carnage on that show than at the game...RIP Chris Manawa, not that I'm really going to miss your annoying character...

Thank goodness, the Chiefs have had the week off so maybe they can figure out that it was not just the rain that led to that 43-14 debacle. Sheesh...to think people picked them as  a playoff team, and Tony G actually picked them to win this game. I mean, so did I, but man...stop embarrassing us on national tv. We all have to go back to work and defend that on Monday to laughing co-workers, especially Steelers fans.

My fantasy teams both lost last week and will probably lose this week because Lucille Swings is batting without Cam Newton (although Andy Dalton is a decent replacement) and no kicker, because I've dropped all the people I am willing to drop during the bye week, and I'm not taking a chance that someone will grab Cairo Santos before I can get him back. Lockte and Loaded is a nightmare, and I will soon refer to them as the team who shall not be named. Fantasy players the byes for this week are Kansas City, Jacksonville, Seattle, and New Orleans.

Last week, my picks were a garbage dump with a 5-10 finish. My record for the season is now at 34-29. I hope I will do far, far better this week. Who knows...

Sunday, October 9, 2016
San Diego Chargers vs. Oakland Raiders: Oakland
New England Patriots vs. Cleveland Browns:  New England
Philadelphia Eagles vs. Detroit Lions:  Philadelphia
Chicago Bears vs. Indianapolis Colts:  Indianapolis
Tennessee Titans vs. Miami Dolphins:  Tennessee
Houston Texans vs. Minnesota Vikings:  Minnesota
New York Jets vs. Pittsburgh Steelers:  Pittsburgh
Washington Redskins vs. Baltimore Ravens:  Washington
Atlanta Falcons vs. Denver Broncos:  Denver
Cincinnati Bengals vs. Dallas Cowboys:  Dallas
Buffalo Bills vs. Los Angeles Rams:  Los Angeles
New York Giants vs. Green Bay Packers:  Green Bay

Monday, October 10, 2016
Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. Carolina Panthers:  Tampa Bay

Thursday, October 13, 2016
Denver Broncos vs. San Diego Chargers:  Denver

Until next week, “All I could have said was I don’t know, a sentence that was becoming a kind of witness to our own ignorance or incompetence. Or both.” 
― Jeff VanderMeer

NFL Week 15: What We Know is that We Know Nothing...

Hey everybody! Happy Holidays! For me, happy Christmas break! Woo-Hoo! I have been noticeable quiet about my Kansas City Chiefs. I intend to stay that way. You have to understand that I have been a Chiefs fan for a long, LONG time, and they have had a history of disappointing me on numerous occasions. I will enjoy, but I will not brag or thump my chest about it.

The injury bug has continued to sprinkle his evilness throughout the NFL. I can't be the only person pulling out the team roster to recognize the players on the field. The NFL Postseason is going to be awful interesting, and the Pro Bowl is going to be a bunch of people most of us never heard of in August. If nobody watched the Pro Bowl before, they sure won't this year. (For the record, I only watched when one of my favorites played anyway, i.e the Chiefs, Tony Gonzalez, Jerry Rice, or Joe Montana).

Super Bowl 50 is now 49 days away. Most of us think that all signs point to a Carolina/New England Super Bowl, but do they really?  Yet, to quote Jim Mora himself, "You think you know, but you don't know, and you never will, okay?" Just take a look at last week. There was no way you would have me believe that Indianapolis, San Francisco, Detroit, Denver, and Buffalo would have lost last week, but see, wrong. Carolina and New England should be the Super Bowl, but you never know when an upstart team will upset a sure thing...see Ronda Rousey...


As a result, last week was my worse pick week this year with a lousy 7-10 record which brings my record thus far to 116-79. I would love to say that this week I will do much better, but you know what, I probably won't. Good luck in your fantasy playoff with whoever you can pick up to take the place of the backups you are already using...


Sunday, December 20, 2015
Kansas City Chiefs at Baltimore Ravens: Kansas City
Houston Texans at Indianapolis Colts: Houston
Tennessee Titans at New England Patriots: New England
Carolina Panthers at New York Giants: Carolina
Buffalo Bills at Washington Redskins: Washington
Atlanta Falcons at Jacksonville Jaguars: Jacksonville
Chicago Bears at Minnesota Vikings: Minnesota
Green Bay Packers at Oakland Raiders: Green Bay
Cleveland Browns at Seattle Seahawks: Seattle
Denver Broncos at Pittsburgh Steelers: Pittsburgh
Miami Dolphins at San Diego Chargers: San Diego
Cincinnati Bengals at San Francisco 49ers: Cincinnati
Arizona Cardinals at Philadelphia Eagles: Arizona


Monday, December 21, 2015
Detroit Lions at New Orleans Saints: New Orleans


Thursday, December 24, 2015
San Diego Chargers at Oakland Raiders: San Diego


Saturday, December 26, 2015
Washington Redskins at Philadelphia Eagles: Philadelphia


Until next week, "Playoffs?! Don't talk about playoffs! Are you kidding me? Playoffs?! I'm just hoping we can win a game, another game!"-Jim Mora

NFL Week 13 Picks: Jim Mora Rant Edition

t seems like only yesterday that the football season started with the Saints and Green Bay opening the year. Now, there are only 5 weeks left in the season. Teams are scrambling to put together runs to try to make it to the playoffs. In the lead in the AFC are New England (8-3), Houston (8-3), Baltimore (8-3), Oakland (7-4), Pittsburgh (8-3), and Cincinnati (7-4). New York Jets, Tennessee, and Denver all have a 6-5 record and are trying to play their way into the pack. While in the NFC, the leaders are Green Bay (11-0), San Francisco (9-2), New Orleans (8-3), Dallas (7-4), Atlanta (7-4), and Chicago (7-4). Chicago and Houston are working with back up quarterbacks. Denver has Tim Tebow who has won 5 games in a row. Drew Brees and Aaron Rodgers are playing like men possessed. Atlanta and Dallas are slowly getting their collective acts together. This last month is going to be awesome.

I love fireworks!!!!

Happy Fourth of July Weekend, everybody! Man, it's been almost a month since I've made a post. Sorry, guys. No excuses. Well, I'm back, and in honor of the nation's birthday, I am going to celebrate with my own brand of fireworks-NFL Coaches Rants. There is nothing better than an angry NFL coach who is ready to ring the neck off of some reporters allegedly "dumb" question. Over the years, we have seen a ton of coaches slamming podiums, cursing reporters, cursing players, and generally blowing a gasket. Here are my top five coaching rants.

#5-Mike Singletary: "I WANT WINNERS!!!" When I was growing up, there was no scarier defender on the field than Mike Singletary. I had thousands of miles and a TV screen between us, and he STILL scared me. Fast forward to 2008, and Mike Singletary is a new coach with the San Francisco 49ers. In his first game, Singletary shocked everybody when he sent his star tight end Vernon Davis to the showers early with almost ten minutes left in the game. His speech that followed proved to be even more volatile.



#4-Jim Mora: "DIDDLY POO..." As a kid in Mississippi, I grew up with my local news coming from Louisiana, which meant we were privy to all of Jim Mora's tirades as Coach of the New Orleans Saints. Yes, there were many. I would have probably had Jim in all 5 slots, but I trying to be judicial. Now, I'll always be a Bill Walsh girl, but Jim Mora, I love you, man. The Saints didn't always win, but the fans were always entertained.



3-Herman Edwards: "YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAME!!!" I love Coach Edwards. I loved him as a Jets Coach. I loved him as a Chiefs coach. It was this speech that solidified my love for coach Herm and his diatribes. This speech took place after a New York Jets 2002 loss to the Cleveland Browns. Coach didn't appreciate the reporter's questioning his teams ability to win.



#2-Dennis Green: "CROWN THEIR A**ES!!" Picture it. Monday Night Football. October 16, 2006. Dennis Green and his Arizona Cardinals were resting on a 20 point lead against the Chicago Bears-a lead given up entirely by his offense. To say that Denny Green was unhappy would be an understatement.



#1-Jim Mora: "PLAYOFFS?!" Even non-football fans, have heard of this speech. That's the sign of a good rant. It transcends. Mora commented once that word is uttered to him probably more than any other. Mora had left the Saints and moved on to the Indianapolis Colts. He delievered this speech after a loss to the San Francisco 49ers.



Well, that's my top 5. What's yours? You can't deny that these were some of the best rants ever. Hope you enjoyed them as much as I did. Have a happy and safe Fourth of July weekend! Don't Drink and Drive. Get a Designated Driver. Yeah, that means you NFL, NBA, MLB, and NHLer's. Hire a driver!!!!

Send us out Jim...